The diary of a Saudi man, currently living in the United Kingdom, where the Religious Police no longer trouble him for the moment.

In Memory of the lives of 15 Makkah Schoolgirls, lost when their school burnt down on Monday, 11th March, 2002. The Religious Police would not allow them to leave the building, nor allow the Firemen to enter.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

French Riots: Culprit Exposed! 

The situation in France isn't getting any better. According to the BBC, the riots are spreading to other cities, and last night, over 900 cars were burned, providing yet another boost for the French motor industry. What happens when they run out of cars? Perhaps they'll start on people. Not like the unfortunate wheelchair lady in the bus who got 20% burns, but mobile people, people who try to run away, that'll be far more satisfying.

So why should I care? I'm also an Arab, and a Muslim, but I come from a relatively peaceful country, live a nice professional lifestyle. And indeed, that's the predictable reaction of many fellow-Arabs. We're nothing to do with those trashy ex-Algerians and ex-Chadians.

Wise up, people. We're all getting tarred with the same brush. A typical reader comment to that BBC article is:

The image of Muslum/ Arabs as portrayed by the media is like a pack of wild animals. The riots in Paris are not helping. Media shows them burning down their own neighborhoods. Images from the middle east show them chanting slogans of death towards the western world, hysterical yelling and screaming, burning flags, jumping up and down beating mock-ups of the US president with sticks. Whats happening in Paris only fans the flames of hatred and misunderstanding directed towards Arabs and Muslims.

Or, a brief quote from a long article in "National Review Online", (and, fellow-Muslims, let's not try and dismiss this as typical neocon propaganda, this message is becoming increasingly heard and influential)

despite the various professed grievances (e.g., India should get out of Kashmir; Russia should get out of Chechnya; England should get out of Iraq; Christians should get out of Indonesia; or Westerners should get out of Bali), the perpetrators were all self-proclaimed Islamic radicals. Westerners who embrace moral equivalence still like to talk of abortion bombings and Timothy McVeigh, but those are isolated and distant memories. No, the old generalization since 9/11 remains valid: The majority of Muslims are not global terrorists, but almost all such terrorists, and the majority of their sympathizers, are Muslims.

So then, faced with the world's increasing disapproval, and backed into that corner, we come out with our most telling argument. We are victims. We are God's Chosen Victims.

Let's list all the people who have done horrible things to us, and made us behave a little badly, on occasion. Well of course the Crusaders. A few centuries ago, almost a millenium in fact, but we couldn't do without the Crusaders. Then the Colonists. British and French Colonists usually fit the bill here. Then the Orientalists, although we get that completely mixed up, because those guys were actually romantic nineteenth-century Byronic types who were very sympathetic to us. Don't let's forget the prime twentieth-century Orientalist, Lawrence of Arabia, he's the cause of a lot of it.

What we don't mention is (hush) the O-word. The O-word? Yes, the Ottomans. From Turkey. (The same people who now want to join the European Union and introduce Europeans to the wonderful world of honor-killings - although, to be fair, they are not all cruel, and 21% didn't believe in killing adulteresses, just in cutting their nose and ears off. "Now try wearing those provocative eyeglasses, harlot!") From 1831 to their defeat in 1914, the Ottoman Turks ruled the roost in the Middle East, all the way down to Makkah. And if you read that article, imagine how bad they were back then, and you may well believe that they screwed up the place big time. However, we never blame them, because (and I'm sure you are ahead of me here) THEY ARE MUSLIMS. We do however blame Lawrence of Arabia, who, together with the Hashemite Arab tribes, kicked their butts all the way back to Turkey, because he was (all together now) AN INFIDEL AND AN UNBELIEVER.

Nevertheless, as people who have victimized us, they are all a bit old and dusty. What we need is a modern-day culprit to blame. And I'm pleased to announce that the Saudi "Arab News" has found that person. In fact, the "Green Truth" can tell us all exactly what's happening on the Paris street, because they have such credibilite de rue in the quartiers, they'll tell us precisely what's going down.

France’s Ticking Time Bomb

But how did it all start? The accepted account is that sometime last week a group of young boys in Clichy engaged in one of their favorite sports: Stealing parts of parked cars.

This may need a bit of explanation. How exactly do you play this sport? What are the rules? Well, it starts when someone's car breaks down. Perhaps a flat tyre, perhaps a broken transmission. It's a bit like "Tag". If it happens to you, you are "It". So you have to repair your car. Now you don't want to go and fix the part yourself, because that involves going to technical school and learning a trade and honest toil, that's a Kuffar Thing. Neither do you want to spend your surplus funds on buying a new one, because it's much more enjoyable to use your money on stuff that will go up your veins or nostrils. The rules say instead that you must get your part from another car. But don't go up to someone and say "Hey, fella, you've got a 1999 Renault Megane just like mine, can I have your transmission?", because that would be too easy. Instead, you need to steal it when he's not looking. Then, when he gets in the next morning and the engine revs like mad because there's no transmission, you can all have a laugh, and he is now "It", and it starts all over again. Of course that's the simpler version, there's a whole scoring system, 2 points for a wing mirror, 25 points for a transmission, and a whopping 500 if you leave the car suspended on bricks with no wheels, engine, or indeed anything useful.

So there they are, these sportsmen, thoroughly enjoying themselves. What happens next?

Normally, nothing dramatic would have happened as the police have not been present in that suburb for years. The problem came when one of the inhabitants, a female busybody, telephoned the police and reported the thieving spree taking place just opposite her building.

There, folks, is our culprit. A "busybody" and, wouldn't you know it, a female one! What is it with these people? Why do they have to phone the police when they see someone being mugged, or a house being broken into, or a traffic accident? Do they lead such sad and lonely lives that they have no-one else to talk to? Like this guy who called 999 in London on 7/11, as reported last week.

"There's people lying in the road, there's a London bus, it's a 30 (route number), I think," the caller told the 999 operator.
"There's people trying to get out. I think there's ambulances on the way, but there's people dead and everything by the looks of it."

He's another busybody! And a man, so he should know better! Doesn't he have a job to do, sales to make, a report to finish? What's he doing, looking out of the window, and talking on the phone? Busybodies. Ugh. Always stirring up trouble. I don't know about you, but me and the "Arab News", we can live without them.

So after our busybody interfered in a sporting event, the rest of the whole sorry tale is history.

A brief chase took place in the street and two of the youths, who were not actually chased by the police, sought refuge in a cordoned off area housing a power pylon. Both were electrocuted.

And that busybody is the person who sparked the whole thing off. Shocking.

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